A lot of people ask me to do things for them. Some are trivial, some are important. Unfortunately I can not do them all.
In general I have a hard time saying no to people, it's in my nature to help out, especially when all I would be giving up to help out is time, need a ride somewhere, especially when I am already out and about I'm usually good for doing that, need a hand with some homework, or notes posted? I'm usually good for doing that too. Those things are easy, and I enjoy doing them usually. The common thing that those things share is that they are in my comfort zone, its easy to give someone a ride somewhere, it's easy to post notes online and such.
In school I decided I would only help those that help themselves. I think that this decision has not only helped me in brushing off people that want to get somewhere with no effort, but it's also helped the people around me do their own hard work. At karate I will help everyone of course, it is my role there, those who are showing real effort to learn and grow, no matter their level are always going to get that little extra.
In life in general it's much harder. If I did everything asked of me by everyone I would go insane. Sometimes I agree to help people just so they stop bugging me, that is usually how I get tied up on the phone doing surveys and crap. I rarely flat out deny anyone, because I'm the type of guy that if I have the time I'll do whatever it is that is being asked of me. Sometimes I delay a decision and feel crappy about it after, struggling to be okay with what I decided, or put off deciding.
I do what I can.
We all do Chris. Life tends to serve us up lessons that strengthen us in one way or another. Perhaps it's that those of us who are strong physically are less strong emotionally, or those who are mental athletes lack stamina in other ways...The point is, as long as a person can say they did their best, then there can be no room for guilt or regret. I'm learning that now. And what we can do today might be quite different from what we can do tomorrow, or the day after that. There is no great honour in destroying ourselves for the benefit of another. Sometimes, the greatest loyalty we owe is to ourselves, to keep ourselves physically healthy, mentally well, and emotionally stable - whatever form that takes for the individual. If anyone ends up put out because of that, they get over it - if they matter at all. Trust me, they do. :)
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