Acceptance?

I was watching Oprah today at work, don’t judge – we only get one channel.  And the story today was about a woman that was over-weight back in 2005 and then had some gastric bypass surgery and lost weight.  However during the time that she was big her father did nothing but put her down and call her fat and so on.  Now that she is thin her father is all nice to her and according to her they have a great relationship.

I said to the other person watching ‘Seriously?’  How can you put down your own child like that and then go on an pretend that everything is fine after.  How can she just be ok with the fact that her father was a huge jerk to her before hand and then carry on like everything is hunky dory after?

Does she really have acceptance?  Who did she lose the weight for?  Is she really happy about the whole situation?  I had to go back to work after what I had seen so far but I can’t imagine that someone that has to look a certain way for their own father to be nice to them can be all that happy.  And is it really acceptance from the father if he is only nice to his daughter because she is thin?

Acceptance and love should have been happening in the first place.  Accept people for who they are, what they do.  Not everyone is going to be in your group of friends for a variety of reasons but appearance should not be one of them.  '”There is a difference”, I said this to the other person in the room today, “between putting someone down and wanting better for that person.”  Case in point, when I was big my mom would say things like ‘I want you to be happy and healthy’ or things of that sort, not ‘Lose weight because you can’t be happy being that fat!’  She wanted better for me for ages, but I was never denied love or attention from her in the meantime.

Acceptance should not be about a certain look, clothes or size.  It’s about finding the good in someone and welcoming that into your life, and the both of you being better for it.