A friend asked me the other day how I keep motivated, and how I try to motivate my wife. The short answer to the second part of that is that I don’t. I encourage Amber to go do things, I ask if she’s been to the gym and whatnot, or if she’s stuck to her latest thing on her blog. However I have learned that if I push too hard she just gets upset with me. I know her time is limited and she often picks up extra time teaching and that during the school year is not a good time to be pestering her about how long or how often she has fit in time to work out.
Knowing what I know now about working out and being in shape and all that it makes me a bit sad that she puts it off here and there. But she does not know what I know in this regard and until her body learns it (and not her brain) she’s not going to see things the way I do.
However another thing that I know is that the motivation has to come from within. No matter how much someone else might want it for you, you have to be the one that does it. This example is clearly shown in my own journey. I needed to get into shape to do what needed to be done to get my black belt at karate. Hints and nods were given to this fact for quite some time, I was a brown belt for three years! I even had seven months where I was laid off before I went back to school that would have been the perfect opportunity to spend time at the gym like it was a 9-5 job. But I didn’t. I was not ready for it. Once I was ready, mentally, it was like a switch was flipped and boom each little success led to extra motivation and I shed those pounds like nothing else.
My wife is beautiful and I love her. Would I like it if she decided to go all-in for a while and get in shape, yes. That fact makes no difference though, she has to want it for herself from within.
How do I keep motivated? By achieving more. By out peddling guys on road bikes while I am on my mountain bike. By lifting more weight at the gym and by getting new and fresh programs at the gym when I get bored with the current one I am doing. I stay motivated because I am on my own journey and I can do great things.